Why you don’t need to control every detail of your narrative

There’s a famous quote from Emerson Fittipaldi, the Formula 1 legend: “If you have everything under control, you’re not going fast enough.” He was talking about racing, but the same idea applies to personal branding. Many professionals obsess over controlling every single detail of how they present themselves, fearing that any deviation will tarnish their image. The reality is twofold: first, complete control is impossible; second, by trying too hard to manage everything, we miss out on an extraordinary force—our audience’s ability to complete the picture for us.

One of the most powerful principles of human perception comes from Gestalt psychology, which teaches us that people don’t process isolated fragments—they interpret patterns and fill in the gaps. This applies directly to how others perceive your personal brand. No matter how carefully you curate your online presence, your speeches, or even your attire, your audience will always rework those elements through their own experiences, expectations, and biases.

Rather than seeing this as a loss of control, we should recognize it as an opportunity. Instead of over-engineering every aspect of how we present ourselves, we can build a strong yet open-ended narrative—one that is structured enough to communicate our value but flexible enough to allow others to see what they need in us.

A good friend of mine has developed a method for analyzing LinkedIn engagement to assess a person’s network and influence. She examines who likes the posts of individuals she’s investigating, using these interactions to map out their connections and gauge their reach. This is Gestalt in action—the whole is greater than the sum of its parts: she will re-imagine your profile based on a limited set of cues. If you want to make a strong impression on her, you should be mindful of who engages with your posts.

Micromanaging your personal branding often backfires. It feels forced, unnatural, and ultimately exhausting for both you and the audience. Instead, you should focus on creating strong foundational elements—a clear value proposition, a high level of credibility and the legitimation to offer your solution—while leaving space for your network, your community, and even the broader market to participate in shaping your reputation.

The same applies to personal storytelling. When we share our experiences, we don’t need to over-explain or control every reaction. The best narratives leave room for interpretation, allowing people to connect with our stories in their own way. Some might see resilience in our career pivots, while others might admire our strategic thinking. By giving them space to form their own conclusions, we create stronger emotional connections and, paradoxically, a more powerful brand.

Ultimately, personal branding is not a solo act. It’s a co-creation between how we present ourselves and how others perceive us. Instead of trying to control every detail, we should focus on providing strong signals and trust that our audience will connect the dots.